


"Hey, have you seen the…? Oh!"

by wanderingwitchoftime



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Lingerie, M/M, domestic AU, t his is dumb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-01
Updated: 2014-07-01
Packaged: 2018-02-07 01:27:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1879818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wanderingwitchoftime/pseuds/wanderingwitchoftime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>http://wanderingwitchoftime.tumblr.com/post/90356318018/johndave-hey-have-you-seen-the-oh<br/>^tumblr post</p><p>John apparently doesn't know how to knock.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"Hey, have you seen the…? Oh!"

**Author's Note:**

> http://pierceaholic.tumblr.com/post/88980020838/send-me-a-pairing-and-a-line-of-dialogue-and-ill-write  
> there's the meme that started it all. Aha, i got one of those in the post so I had to write this (it was fun). The post got more notes than I expected it to, so, I decided to post it. It's kind of ridiculous, but here it is~

"Hi, John. I’ve got a favor to ask." Rose says into the phone.

"What’s that?" John asks absently, muting his video game.

"You know that bag I had when I visited earlier? It seems I must have left it in your living room."

"Oh! Alright, I’ll look for it." John stands from the couch and begins looking around.

"Thank you,"

"What was in it, anyway?" 

"Oh, just a little gift for Kanaya…"

"Gift?" He repeats. Having no luck in the living room, he moves to the kitchen and resumes his search.

"Alright, I’ll tell you. It’s devil lingerie, and it wasn’t cheap."

He giggles. “Don’t worry, I’ll find your little gift.”

She lets out an easy sigh. “Thanks again. Text me when you’ve got it and I’ll drop by.”

"Okay! Bye, Rose."

"Bye,"

John sets his phone down on the counter. After leaving the kitchen, he looks around the living room again. Still not seeing it, he sighs and tries the bathroom, and then his room. The only remaining room is his roommate, Dave’s, bedroom. He’s been in there doing who knows what since Rose left. 

John walks across the hall to Dave’s door and opens it. “Hey, have you seen the… Oh!”

Dave is standing, leaning slightly towards the mirror on his wall, carefully applying black lipstick. He’s wearing nice, lacy, red lingerie, complete with small black wings and two red horns (not that Kanaya would need those). Dave turns his head towards the door, mouth open, lips half painted black, and cheeks red. John’s eyes sweep over Dave’s body before snapping back up to his dark, gold rimmed aviators. John’s sure he’s blushing too.

They stare at each other for a minute before Dave straightens himself out and casually says, “Damn Egbert, din’t your mama ever teach you to knock?”

"Sorry Dave! I was going to ask if you’ve seen the bag Rose left here… Something tells me you have." John snickers.

"Yeah. Uh, give me a second, I’ll change."

"Alright. You look nice by the way, you should ask Rose to get you one."

Dave grabs a random shirt off the floor and begins throwing it at John, but he closes the door before it hits.

John waits on the couch. He tries to ignore the voice in his mind reminding him how hot Dave is.

When the blonde finally comes out of his room, he’s wearing only his black and gray flannel boxers. He sits on the couch next to John and sets the bag on the other’s lap.

Dave looks at John. “Bro, you’re blushing harder now than before, what’s up?”

"Shut up, shut up is what." John replies, looking away.

"Yeah, whatever." Dave pauses. "I can explain, by the way."

Now John looks at him. “Really? Go for it.”

"I found the bag, and I looked in it, and after the initial disgust at the image of Rose in… Yeah, One word came to me."

"What word?"

"Irony."

"Of course,"

"Just disappointed I didn’t get any pics."

"Rose could have waited."

"I’ll just have to get my own."

"Heh, yeah."

It’s quiet for a minute. John texts Rose and she comes, takes the bag, and goes. 

Later, the boys are watching TV, John with his head in Dave’s lap and Dave with his hand in John’s hair. John’s watching Dave more than the show, analyzing his expressions and the lines and curves of his facial features.

"Dave?"

"Yeah?" 

"Is lingerie comfortable?"

"Eh, it’s not bad. I mean it probably depends on the brand and style and shit. Why, you planning on buying some?"

John grins. ”Maybe. Should I?”

"I’d love to see you in it. Ooh, I’ll get the devil one, and you can get an angel one."

"Yeah! And maybe later, you could see it off." John winks jokingly. 

"Hah," Dave continues staring at the television screen.

John sits up and snuggles into Dave’s side instead. Dave puts his arm around John easily. John resumes his Dave-watching. He has a much better view of Dave's face now. He realizes that he likes the way Dave’s lips are shaped, and how his nose is shaped, also his jaw and cheekbones- John counts the colors in Dave’s hair, noting where it’s lighter or darker than the rest. 

It takes a while, but Dave eventually notices that John isn’t watching the TV and mutes it.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" He asks, raising an eyebrow.

"I—I like your face?" John answers, unsure.

"Uh, okay, thanks."

John pauses. Dave is still looking at him funny. Finally John begins, “Do you believe in bisexuality?”

Dave’s eyebrows shoot up. “… Yeah? I mean, it’s a completely real thing, that lots of people are-“

"You don’t think it’s like, greedy or slutty or anything?"

"No, Dude. Just cause I like cake and pie doesn’t mean I’m gonna eat both at the same time. And I can if I want, as long as the cake and the pie are both cool with it."

"Heh…  _Do_  you like cake and pie?”

"Yeah. I also like ice cream and cookies."

"Hm, wow."

Dave continues looking at John, amused. “Uh, you gonna tell me why you’re acting weird or what?”

"Wait, I will but just- In this metaphor, which one represents boys?"

"I don’t know, pie I guess."

"Is there a certain kind of pie you like?"

"Apple?"

"No, I mean-"

"Okay, yeah, I like ‘em buff usually." 

"Huh." John was a scrawny kid at 13, but after all that hammer practice, he’s become, well, ripped.

"You’re freaking me out, dude."

"I’m gettin’ there- So there are lots of buff pies out there, but is there a specific buff pie you like more than the others?"

"You want to know if I have a crush on anyone?"

"Uh-huh."

"…Well, yeah, I do." He looks away finally.

"Who?"

"First you tell me why you’re being weird. Is it because of the lingerie thing? Come on dude, it wasn’t that bad."

"No, that’s not it… Please, you tell me first."

"No deal."

John groans dramatically.

"Not happening."

"Ugh, okay fine. Um…" John bites his lip and blushes.

"Do you like me?" Dave asks quickly.

"What?"

"Is that it? Do you have a crush on me?"

"U-uh," John looks down at his lap. "I think so."

Dave puts a hand on John’s chin and raises his head. “Yes or no, Dude.”

"…Yes."

Dave lets out a sigh of relief. “Same.”

"What?"

"Same."

"But what do you mean?"

"I like you too."

"You do?"

"Uh huh."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

After a few seconds, they both started laughing, and then John kisses Dave and they lived happily ever after.


End file.
